A quiet kind of strength, a resilience often overlooked, comes with doing it alone, not because you wanted to, but because life asked it of you. This post is for the mothers who wear every hat, juggle every role, and still find a way to show up, day after day, for themselves and, most importantly, their children.

Today, we’re hearing from Busingye, a single mom of two lovely boys from Kampala, Uganda. She’s honest about the hard days, the small victories, and the fierce love that keeps her going.

“It’s not about being strong all the time—it’s about showing up, even when you feel like falling apart.”

Q&A:

Q: What does a typical day in your life look like?
A: Honestly! It starts before the sun and ends long after everyone else is asleep. When the kids were still in day school, I would get the kids ready, do school drop-offs if the bus wasn’t available, and do some day work. No one talks about how the day rushes to start and end before you can lift a simple finger to do all the tasks on your day’s calendar.  I wait for the kids to be dropped off by the school bus, then cook, clean, help with homework, and try to hold everything together and have them in bed by 9 pm to ensure they rest enough before the next day. Most days feel like a blur, but in the chaos, there are these tiny moments—my kid’s laugh, a hug before bed—that remind me why I keep going.

Q: What assumptions or judgments have you faced as a single mom?
A: Oh, there are so many. People assume I must be struggling or bitter, or that I can’t possibly raise good kids alone. It’s frustrating because no one sees how hard I work or how much love is in our home.  In our African setting or culture, society always talks about it. I was hurt and disturbed, but I had to brave up and cater to my children because they needed a strong mother. I developed a tough skin and accepted my position, and not even mere talks would change the situation. Some people went on to suggest to me that I should find another partner and get married again so that the kids get a father figure.  I attempted to explain it to some people, but remembered that no one deserved my explanation. Only my children deserved the answer, yet they were so young and fragile, so I had to protect them.  So many people questioned my choices = not knowing that this choice was individually taken without consultation, so I needed to brave myself for what was ahead. To the society that judges people for the decisions they make, I want to remind them that being a Single mother doesn’t mean being broken. It means resourceful, strong, and deeply committed. Your feelings of judgment are valid, and you are not alone in this.”

Q: Where do you find strength on the hard days?
A: Sometimes I don’t feel strong, I go on autopilot with learning to take a day at a time and be positive. I am also glad that I have support from my parents, siblings, and friends who always look out for me, encourage me, and also listen to me every time I have a few things to say, and when I am exhausted, they come in to help with the boys. But I think strength is in the quiet choices: showing up to the school concert even when I’m exhausted, making dinner when all I want is silence, hugging my kids tighter after a hard day.  Some days, my children make me cry, smile, laugh, and feel all the emotions in one go, and on most days, I get help from my children’s grandparents. And on the tough days, I remind myself that, “You’ve made it through worse.” I constantly remind myself that the hard days come and go, but the constant stays, and that the unwavering love I have for my boys, whom I believe in, and they see me as their hero, despite the tears.

Q: What does your Support look like? Do you have support, or do you wish for more?
A: The beauty in my situation is that I had to go back home to my parents’ home, and what that means is that I get to feel my parents’ love, and so do my children. So to answer the question, I have my kids’ grandparents and a few close friends who check in and help when they can. No one talks about the financial struggles that single mothers go through with = little help, but yes, there have been struggles in that area; help is there. Still, I can’t rely on it because I have to work extra hard to support the kids’ education, well-being, and the little things that money can provide for them to feel supported.  But emotionally? It gets very lonely. It’s hard to admit when you need help without feeling burdened. Many times I’ve had to learn to advocate for myself and reach out, even when it’s uncomfortable.

Q: What message would you give to other single moms who feel like they’re drowning?
A: Hey Mama, A pat on your back, you are doing better than you think. Even if no one is clapping for you, you are seen. In all sincerity, working hard, being determined, and planning for the future in advance is what my advice is. Never compare your journey to anyone’s; strive for a healthy, happy home that nurtures your children. Your kids may not see it now, but they will remember you kept showing up regardless. Please be sure to give yourself grace. You’re not failing—you’re carrying the world.

There is no blueprint for single motherhood. No perfect answer. Just a woman doing her best, often in silence, with a heart full of love and a mind full of responsibility. And that deserves recognition.